HAPPY HALLUJUWEEN MUTHUFUCKA!!!

Tonight is Halloween, it's a Holigay. Other than Gay Pride, this is my
people's other holiday. I had a jam packed weekend that I don't have time to
get into here, but I will tell you the funniest thing that happened to me. I
was filling in for someone on this modeling and acting panel, you know where
smaller agencies send their talent to possibly be picked up by a larger
agency. It was on Saturday and it was only for a couple of hours and it paid
me $150, I was all over it since it was quick money. I felt like an
imposter, not to long ago I was at the same kind of auditions trying to make
it. I was at the very end of the panel and I was sort of upset that I had
spent a lot of time picking out the right outfit that said "I can make all
your dreams come true!" but I also wanted it to say "You should have worked
harder!". I wore all black and a big black scarf and my glasses and my hair
was tussled in that I'm artistic and gay but I didn't spend to much time on
my hair, but I really did. Everyone else walked in looking like they were
asking for change on the subway and I could feel their bitchiness, I kept
quiet the whole time. These were some bad auditioners, bad monologues and
very green. I felt sad for them so I started to leave almost everyone
detailed notes on there pacing and beats, line readings and energy. I kept
thinking that I would have liked to have had this feedback when I was
struggling so I was scribbling away when I noticed a name on my sheet that
brought some bad feelings for it, but I couldn't remember why, then HE
walked in. There was a friend of my Roommates who's own roommate a
struggling performer whom I met over last summer. I thought he was a cute
Jake Gylennhaal doppelganger, only his was blonde and over six feet. But he
had those same blue sleepy eyes and crooked smile that I instantly wanted,
so whatever Lolo wants, Lolo gets. We had met at this gay bar and he, of
course, had no money and for some reason at the time I did, so I got him
drunk. We made out the whole night and when it was over we promised to call
and see each other again. Well the next day he called ME! We replayed the
previous night together and made plans to see a movie and grab a bite, well
I got dressed in my cutest outfit and waited, and waited, and waited. He
never called or returned my messages or phone calls, I think me redialing
over and over again might have scared him, you think? I was pissed because I
had spent a lot of money on his ass and didn't get any of it, so I let it
go. I saw him again a couple of months later and he tried to say that he was
sorry about that night and if he could call me again, I said okay knowing
that he wouldn't and he didn't, end of story..right? So I'm writing down
some notes and looking down at my paper and I hear this voice that I
instantly connect with the name that I was angry at, enter this dopey
looking kid that looked like the hot guy that I had met in my haze at the
bar, but it wasn't, it couldn't, could it? SHIT! Here he was in broad
daylight, not bar light, and he was less than breathtaking, a lot less, more
like a burp, or a hiccup. This was the guy that threw me for tailspin for a
couple of weeks? He walks in and introduces himself and recognizes me and
stops short, I wave and smile and thank the Gods for karma. I settle in for
what I know will be a shitty monologue and I am rewarded with a long drawn
piece of shit that I couldn't help but smile when he was done. I think he
thought that I was impressed, I was,but not with him. I was impressed with
the cosmos, and what sense of humor it has. This kind of shit only happens
in the movies, most of my friends stated, the movies and me.
I LOVE NY!! I'm off tonight to a bunch of parties, I can't wait, it's gonna
be FUN!! I'll have picks by manana. Love you guys..DF.