Go-Go Man...

Liquor before beer your in the clear. Beer before liquor, never been sicker! Or is it wine before beer you feel queer? Or beer before wine, feel fine? Or is it righty tighty, lefty loosey? I can never remember the saying, all I know is that last night turned out to be one of my famous drank waaaay to much nights that I can honestly say it didn't have me making an ass out of myself like I normally do! This time it was Dad's turn, someone should have warned the non-drinker to not try and match me drink to drink, you'll lose almost every time. #3 is in California, so Dad and I were going to go out for a minute and have a drink and catch up. Before he even got to my place I had finished a bottle of cheap white wine, so I was good and toasty when we set off for the Boy's Room, an east village gay bar that I love! I like to get there early so I can miss the long coat check line, but mainly it's for the open bar that they have before midnight. We started drinking and having a good ol' time, saw my favorite Go-Go boy and the rest of the heathens that run the Saturday night party. Tam showed up around midnight and I had his favorite drink waiting for him so he could start right away. It started to pick up around 1am and by that point the three of us were drunk, and waiting for the Go-Go Boy contest they have on Saturday to begin. Every Saturday guys can sign up and compete for $300 in the contest, they have get on stage and take of their clothes and make the crowd happy. The audience chooses who goes onto second part of the contest where it can get pretty raunchy and debaucherous. So usually it's hot, cute, young guys that need the money for rent do the contest, so it came as a shock to Tam and I when Dad was called up onto stage(using an alias of course) to strip down and shake his groove thing! I was mortified! All I could do was watch as he was up there dancing and showing what his momma gave him, LORD! #3 is gonna KILL me is what kept running through my head. We ended up cheering along with everyone and making sure that his pants and shirt were safe. Dad did great, I mean, he was drunk and had liquid courage and is a MAN, not a boy anymore. He was a G0-Go Man and didn't need the money, so I have no idea what made him want to get on stage. There were only three contestants and he made into the second round onto the bar, he made some tips and then I can't remember who won. It's kind of blur, after that was over we hung around and drank some more and kept loosing each other. I had to fight to keep this busted guy from taking advantage of my best friend's husband, cuz I'm a Latina and that's what we do. We were all a hot mess, finally got things settled with taking him home and as we were leaving I saw the winner of Project Runway, Jay, and I walked up and told him how much I loved him, and then Dad throw up at his feet and we had to leave. We couldn't find a cab to take us uptown, so we walked home, in the snow mind you. New York decided that the first snow was to fall last night, and it did, a lot! We stumbled home with Dad, practically carrying him and trying to reassure #3 that his soulmate was safe. Dragged him up six flights of stairs and then put him to bed. We woke up Roommate and his boyfriend, staggered out and went to eat with Tam at diner 24. I always have to eat before I go to bed when I'm that drunk and eat we did. Came home and got some big bottles of water and Gatorade for us and crawled into bed with Dad. He woke up at 10am like nothing happened and didn't have a hangover and went home. Meanwhile, I'm laid up in bed, nursing my hangover and watching the LOGO channel. I gotta say, my Saturday nights are getting crazier every week, I don't think that I handle much more of this, #3 better hurry up and get here! I can't wait for Tam to call me so I can get his take on last night. I feel old....I am old... df!